Married Women Hunger For Love Too

Where there is marriage without love, there will be love without marriage.
—Benjamin Franklin, Poor Richard

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Falling in love and getting married are supposed to solve the problem of the hunger for love. Unfortunately, all too often, it does not quite work that way. Sometimes, a marriage becomes loveless or, at least, is felt by the wife to be loveless because of her husband’s distant behavior. The opposite of love is not hatred but indifference.

The indifferent husband does not interact with his wife with much intensity. He has other concerns and preoccupations, be they his work or sports, and his interest in his wife appears to be exhausted. It well may be that he still loves her, but he has ceased to show it in any meaningful way. A woman friend of mine told me that she remembered exactly when she decided to have her first affair. “I was feeling neglected and finally asked him straight out, ‘Do you love me?’ He looked up from his newspaper and answered, ‘Of course, I love you. That’s my job.’ And he went back to reading his newspaper. That did it. I couldn’t imagine having nothing but that attitude for the rest of my life. I’m too young to just give up having a good life.”

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